Spring 2010 - Getting It Together

Usually when I've placed myself into some sort of horrible situation, I sometimes tell myself "Noelle, get it together!"; somewhat serious, somewhat jokingly. We're not going to talk about Fall 2009 since that's behind us. Mistakes were made, lessons have been learned. With a new year and a new semester upon us, it's a perfect time for a refresh.

HOLD ON, doesn't this sound too sappy and pleasant to be coming from me? Let's get real...

To be completely honest, I didn't really like the way my first semester of college went. I'm not going to go too far into detail about everything, but I passed all of my classes, the living sitch and my roomies (only 2 now! woohoo!) are cool, and I managed to squeeze some fun in here and there. Moving on.

I had mixed feelings about the new semester approaching, but alas, it's here. My workload is more intensive, as I have a math course, a science course, a real engineering class, and German as well. Oddly enough, I look forward to it. I learned last semester that I'm barely productive when I have too much free time. Keeping my schedule loaded (within reason) should keep me on my toes. Even with a more difficult courseload, I feel that I'll be more successful this semester because my motivation has changed...well, I have motivation period this time around. Though the future is such a great unknown, I can't help but to get excited about it. Despite seeming so far out of reach, it always seems better than the present. Yadda yadda, kids these days wanting to grow up too fast, I know, I know, I'll savor the moment.

I would say something about me needing to improve socially, but it's still not that big of a deal to me. I've come to accept that I'm a loner. I find it incredibly funny that it doesn't really phase me unless I think about. Don't be mistaken, I do enjoy my time spent with others, but I also treasure personal space; to remain unchallenged, unrestricted, to think, to move, to function independently. I've already made too many accessory "friends" -- the type that seem super buddy buddy bffs forever when you first meet them, but will barely acknowledge your presence in passing a month later. Perhaps that's why I sometimes come off as standoffish, because I refuse to be vulnerable to superficial friendships. The conventional college socialization methods (ie. wild parties, clubs, etc.) are unappealing to me so it may take longer to find worthwhile, lasting friendships. Maybe it's better that way.

With a more positive outlook, I look forward to the rest of this semester, my college career, and my life, and hope for the absolute best. (What am I on with all this cheesiness I'm spouting?) I don't blog much when depressed, so let's hope the good mood sticks around and I'll keep steadily pumping out the blogs and vlogs (<-- heh, that rhymes!).